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'Take a stand against violent behaviour in A&E'


Anonymous | 22-Nov-2011 2:13 pm 'He said at no point was he told what would happen next.' That is an extremely common complaint, from the public. This 'not talking properly to people' happens all over the place, and is the root cause of many of the problems, confusions and confrontations which happen everwhere in both life and healthcare'. By coincidence, I just sent an e-mail to my local PALS office which included the following: Nick Clark's widow was talking about his death 5 years ago, on R4's PM yesterday just before 6 pm. Now, amongst her points were these 2: 1) I'm not really sure if we both wanted to be told if Nick was going to get better, or to die - but we didn't actually ask, and nobody told us - until 2 days before his death, I was told, and I don't think Nick ever was told. 2) Because we were not told earlier, we did not have a chance to 'say goodbye to each other properly'. His widow, who said 1) was a common experience amongst the bereaved spouses she had subseqently talked to, also pointed out that 'other people who saw Nick a few weeks before his death, could see he was dying - but I'm not sure that I could see that'. She now suspects, but can't be sure, that Nick also knew he was dying by then, but never actually said that to her. The problem here, is that I think clinicians don't like to admit that people are dying, until very near to death, because it sometimes upsets people, leads to arguments, lack of hope, etc. Which is one reason why 1) happens. But AFTER A DEATH, WHEN YOU ARE BEREAVED, what 'plays on your mind, FOREVER' is 2) - nobody told us, SO WE COULDN'T PREPARE FOR THE DEATH PROPERLY'.

Posted date

23 November, 2011

Posted time

11:03 am